I need help/advice on how to last longer?

[bigando86]

When I'm having a pull I don't mind blowing reasonably quickly, but when I'm inside my missus i want to last longer than 2 minutes, HELP PLEASE

[Wagerfor]

Do pelvis muscle exercises, to learn how while urinating hold and piss, hold and piss, hold and piss. Then you can do this even other times, hold it for 20 counts, 20 times a day and see the results. In the beginning you may have a little soreness in your lower abdominal muscles. That is ok, it will be fine

[kevindo69]

Yes, the exercise that Wagerfor mentioned does help ...

Another technique :  1 hour before sex , masturbate to the point of ejaculation , but not enough to get full orgasm ( otherwise you would loose your desires to have sex...) 
The idea is to "desensitize" the penis , so you could last longer ...
Daily Masturbation also helps , but ONLY to the point of ejaculation , save the full blown orgasm for your lady...
You'll learn how to ejaculate without orgasm by practicing and feeling the "rush" ... then stop short of it 
Believe it or not , ejaculation and full blown orgasm are 2 separate events ...

"Stop and Go"  technique during sex also helps prolonging it ... ( switch between penetration and oral sex )

Get her to climax first by clitoral stimulation ( oral or with finger+massage oil )  , then you don't have to worry about how long you can last to satisfy your woman.  You would feel more relaxed and take your time to enjoy sex much more...

[Puller58]

All good suggestions and tips.  But you know what step one is?  Talk to her and take the stigma out of it.  She may be just as frustrated with it as you are.  But.....maybe not.  But at least talking gets it out and then you can BOTH work on it with many different games and techniques.   While going through this, make sure to laugh.   You're definitely not alone in this as most men feel that they go off too soon - real or imagined.  You sound like a good guy who actually cares about his partners pleasure.  That already makes you an ace in her eyes.

You may want to try slowing down and varying your strokes,(ie a few short and a few deep), and the speed of thrusting.  Also try going in balls deep and just give her a series of short bumps by hardly drawing backwards - if at all - and just bumping forward in a nudge fashion.  Pay lots of attention to her whole body while you're inside, thus removing your focus from your cock she feels wrapped around your hardon. 

Vary your positions often, but not so often as to distract her from the fun.

See if she will play a game with you to see how many times she can bring you to the point just prior to ejaculation, and then stopping to let you cool down.  You might even try playing a game with her, and see how slow you can go with slow deliberate strokes.  The name of the game is to drive her crazy.  Stimulate her while slowly fucking.  See how many times you can get her off before she wants you to slam away and make her go ahhhhhhhh.

Block off real time for this.  Take the phone of the hook.  Kill the cell.  And if you have kids, then farm them out to a sitter.  Remove anything that would get the mental stopwatch ticking.  Have fun with this, don't focus on it as if it were a failure or a shortcoming, (or shortcumming).

Just sayin........

[Wagerfor]

Yes I agree with Kevin and puller,
It is all a matter of time, and don't sit and worry about not lasting ling enough, find ways of enjoying the sex and the orgasm.
If you can get hold of EMLA cream, apply to your cock 1/2 an before. Your cock becomes numb and you can stay longer. But your sensations will be blunted. Wipe your cock nicely before entering, other wise cream may have effect on her and the effort may become useless!!!

[onlythelonely]

 bigando86, I think you may have answered your own question when you state that Masturbation is usually a quick affair, but when you have intercourse you expect your body to slow down while it's presumably receiving more stimulus both physical & visual. You've gotten some great advise here ( Puller58, I really like the cut of your Jib  !).  Good luck!

[Hardman]

All of the suggestions will help you to last longer, my suggestion goes right along with the others, while you are inside your missus go slower and when you feel that sensation pull out and switch to your fingers and help her to cum that way, perhaps even a toy of some sort to get her off. This always gets me harder watching her cum. Switch it up and when she seems to be satisfied plunge back in and start again. It will take practice...but will be worth it for both of you. Also, when you do cum if she still needs more that is when the toy can come in handy, gives you the time to regain your hardon. Hope this helps.

[Puller58]

It's so nice that your lady is - obviously - so hot to you that you can't control yourself.  Make sure that she knows this.  Tell her in your most intimate moments, and in casual flirtations.  She'll love to know how she makes you a gelatinous mess just by showing up.

There is another technique that you can use.  First talk to your mate and let her know you're as frustrated as she is.  Then use what guys call edging.  What is that?  Well, lots of guys in their early masturbatory career train themself to cum fast because they want to get off before they're found out.  And because guys cant keep their hands of Mr Happy then they train often each week as they grow up.

Edging is a technique that reverses that process of banging a "swift one off the wrist", by wanking to the near point of ejaculation, and then backing off.  The idea is to see how you long you can hold off while driving yourself nuts.

Here's where your missus comes into the picture.  The inside scoop is that women - being highly sensual and psychological in sexual matters - often love to draw things out, (hence the emphasis on anticipatory foreplay).  So then you must ask yourself;  Who else understands and can help me with this "edging"? She gets it!  And best of all, she may love the opportunity to make you crazy, and incorporate it into your love making as a part of foreplay.  Warning:  Don't make this a project by making this mandatory for her.  You do it each time you wank... but don't make her do it every time.  Making work out of it will take the pizazz away.  And don't expect this to work in a week.  Give it several months to start taking effect.  Remember you're reversing years of beating it like it owes you money.  It's going to take some time to get your dick and your mind in synch.

Over time, you will certainly train yourself to back off the plumbing 101 and she'll be the co-benefactor of the whole process.

[Puller58]

You've gotten some great advise here ( Puller58, I really like the cut of your Jib  !).  Good luck!

Thanks M8   

[xmtncpl]

Nature and age have a way of taking care of that naturally,, sometimes it's a good thing but sometimes it's not

[Bport]

There is another technique that you can use.  First talk to your mate and let her know you're as frustrated as she is.  Then use what guys call edging.  What is that?  Well, lots of guys in their early masturbatory career train themself to cum fast because they want to get off before they're found out.  And because guys cant keep their hands of Mr Happy then they train often each week as they grow up.

Edging is a technique that reverses that process of banging a "swift one off the wrist", by wanking to the near point of ejaculation, and then backing off.  The idea is to see how you long you can hold off while driving yourself nuts.

Puller58 has perfectly described what has been a very successful technique for me.  I had always suffered from a very 'short fuse' so to speak and it had negatively impacted several promising relationships over the years.  With the playful help of my current (and long time!) mate AND regular edging practice I was able to greatly extend my staying power.  Extended periods of foreplay with lots of attention to her pleasure allow you to be stimulated without going over the top.  Stop any direct stimulation before you cum, relax a few minutes while looking after her and begin again.  This is really edging with a partner and is both helpful and fun.  Edging by yourself is the same process where you cautiously approach orgasm but don't allow yourself to quite 'get there'.  Maintain the highest level of arousal you can stand as long as you can stand it.  You can even edge without orgasm, leaving the final act for the next session.  All to condition yourself to tolerate higher and higher levels of arousal while maintaining control.

I also think Puller58 has, at least in my case, got the underlying cause pretty well identified.  As a youngster I was always in a hurry to get off before someone discovered what I was up to so I had trained myself to cum fast.  It took a long time to 'undo' this early conditioning and my rehabilitation happily continues to this very day!

In an open, sincere relationship you can have fun with it and your mate will feel good about helping.

[•Matt•]

Another successful tactic...

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[Mani]

*Matt*

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[universal1]

Just start taking effexor.

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