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coffee2008
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« on: October 01, 2018, 11:39:13 AM »

Hello,

I was just wondering how many other married men/women are similar to me. I consider myself bi, yet being married I have tried very hard not to seek out other guys or have any meetups. I think about it a lot, yet I keep my urges at bay with porn and watching guys on cam. I wonder if down the line I will regret not trying. Or if I break down and meet up with someone I might feel guilty as well. It sometime does cause me to get depressed.  If there are similar ppl out there I would love to chat?
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dirk0
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« Reply #1 on: October 01, 2018, 02:09:05 PM »

that sounds like me too, and I don't know the answer! Sad
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Cumcast
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« Reply #2 on: October 02, 2018, 08:11:58 AM »

I kinda feel like like as men get older they revert back to some of the same sex behavior as they did when we were young adolescent or pre adolescent. I have gotten propositions from older fit guys in the last couple of years , took a couple up on it...but to me it seems like the same behavior.
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A_Yarndd
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« Reply #3 on: October 02, 2018, 09:02:24 AM »

I use porn/the online world to explore this side of myself but I don't think I will regret not exploring it in IRL.
There's an ugly stereotype with bisexuality that it somehow equals untrustworthiness - I've seen people say that if they cheat on their hetero-partner with someone of the same sex that it somehow isn't cheating but this just lends itself to reinforcing the stereotype that bisexuals lack the ability to be monogamous.

I don't really see the difference in regretting not trying cock as any different to regretting not trying redheads, or Russians or Nigerians, or short people, or whatever.
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Cumcast
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« Reply #4 on: October 02, 2018, 12:10:32 PM »

Not necessarily a matter of cheating, but regrets about not enjoying, at least for me. While still married, we haven't had sex for over 10 years, we won't divorce for a number of reasons, but I just don't want to forego opportunities for physical contact. So I have been selectively engaging others over the course of of the last 3+ years.
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Spaz
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« Reply #5 on: October 02, 2018, 01:07:59 PM »

I kinda feel like like as men get older they revert back to some of the same sex behavior as they did when we were young adolescent or pre adolescent. I have gotten propositions from older fit guys in the last couple of years , took a couple up on it...but to me it seems like the same behavior.

That's a really interesting thought. I'm inclined to agree.
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GaWd, i'M sooo HoRny riGht nOw...
bigredinmass
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« Reply #6 on: October 02, 2018, 03:55:13 PM »

I kinda feel like like as men get older they revert back to some of the same sex behavior as they did when we were young adolescent or pre adolescent. I have gotten propositions from older fit guys in the last couple of years , took a couple up on it...but to me it seems like the same behavior.
Well said..my 1st experience with another person was a buddy in school. Every now and then I use that memory when alone. My interest in exploring my curious side keeps growing.
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BestinDK
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« Reply #7 on: October 02, 2018, 05:57:35 PM »

Have you thought about talking to your partners about your urges? You might be able to try it without cheating by having a 3some or the like.

I have always wanted to have a MFM (I have many FMF under my belt) but it is not something my husband has any interest in. He hasn't said "never" but at this moment it is not something he is considering. I have accepted this and moved on. It is not the end of the world. I am pansexual, and for a long time I considered myself bi. I have been with both sexes and still have thoughts and fantasies about women, all the time in fact, but its never been something that I have needed to act upon since getting married. I knows I play with women, and men, online, and I know he does the same with women, and sometimes men. I think he likes the idea of trying another man then he would actually like it.

I will never condone cheating. Ever! There is never an excuse of it, and it will always be a selfish move.
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No part of this post or PM can be copied, edited, or re-posted without written permission from me. That goes for my pics, vids or any other content posted on my profile or site by me. Thanks
Mani
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« Reply #8 on: October 02, 2018, 08:07:56 PM »

I'll just offer an insight gained from being on this site quite a few years. I've talked with several guys that finally took the step to experiment with another guy - and found out that what made for a nice jack-off fantasy did not necessarily translate to being such an appealing experience in real life.

As for the possibility of feeling regret for not trying it - or feeling guilty if you do try it - it seems to me you've guaranteed yourself a negative experience either way! What sense does that make?

I'd suggest in this particular context, you'll be able to decide what you truly want if you can dispense with the fear of those inappropriate (to the situation) feelings. Because there is nothing wrong with trying*, and there is nothing wrong with not trying!

* Edit: There is nothing wrong with trying -- provided you are not breaking your marriage vows, e.g. the agreement you have with your wife regarding the nature of your relationship.
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Cumcast
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« Reply #9 on: October 03, 2018, 12:15:05 PM »

Mani makes a terrific point, often desires expressed on line do not translate into IRL activities which are often mitigated by the perceived consequences. However, depending on your situation there may be a certain amount of freedom to expand horizons or out right change direction. Not saying that "it doesn't count if you keep it to yourself" - just that you may find yourself feeling empowered to take action for any number of reasons that fulfill needs beyond curiosity. It maybe for companionship where none else exists, or it can be to experience something or someone when a very rare opportunity presents itself.
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gearpin
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« Reply #10 on: October 04, 2018, 11:03:06 AM »

Not necessarily a matter of cheating, but regrets about not enjoying, at least for me. While still married, we haven't had sex for over 10 years, we won't divorce for a number of reasons, but I just don't want to forego opportunities for physical contact. So I have been selectively engaging others over the course of of the last 3+ years.

I am in a similar situation. I love my wife dearly and she me but as she has gone through menopause she has lost all interest in sex and I have not. We ourselves have not had sex in 4 years and although I am firmly in the bisexual camp, I have not stepped outside the marriage. I just couldn't live with the guilt. Hell, I feel bad when I login here yet here I am.
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skaterdude
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« Reply #11 on: October 06, 2018, 04:24:02 AM »

i was in the same situation as you when i was younger played around with a friend heaps always fantasised about being with a man again tried it twice realised it isnt for me ! although satisfying i much much prefer the smell and feel of women! good luck mate maybe you need to dive in and see if its for you ?
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jm
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« Reply #12 on: October 17, 2018, 12:53:21 PM »

Have you thought about talking to your partners about your urges? You might be able to try it without cheating by having a 3some or the like.

I have always wanted to have a MFM (I have many FMF under my belt) but it is not something my husband has any interest in. He hasn't said "never" but at this moment it is not something he is considering. I have accepted this and moved on. It is not the end of the world. I am pansexual, and for a long time I considered myself bi. I have been with both sexes and still have thoughts and fantasies about women, all the time in fact, but its never been something that I have needed to act upon since getting married. I knows I play with women, and men, online, and I know he does the same with women, and sometimes men. I think he likes the idea of trying another man then he would actually like it.

I will never condone cheating. Ever! There is never an excuse of it, and it will always be a selfish move.

Actually, I was in the same seats and many guys here. Then after a hot evening with my wife we started to talk...you know that post-fucking-talk when both are relaxed. We brought this thing up, sex with same gender. She said she'd try another female for sure if she would get the chance (and my node of course). She also asked me about other men, and before I answered she said "I know IŽd love to watch you and another guy". So we're in the position now where we haven't planned anything, but am allowed too if we find right partners. She was also ok with me showing off myself online, as long as I don't show my face.

I kind of regret not bringing this up earlier.
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jackoffballs
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« Reply #13 on: November 11, 2018, 11:11:24 PM »

This is a Really a very Very interesting question. Am going to be pondering this for many days to come.
Have played cam to cam with several guys and really enjoyed it. It's a real turn on! Several have asked if I want to meet. But have been quite hesitant about it. I know I would jack them off, it would be fun. One thing I worry about is. One thing they always seem to ask is If I would give a BJ, they would give a BJ to me and would I give to them too. I guess I Just don't know, & if I didn't then what. Maybe I should just try it and not worry?

I agree with Cumcast that guys when they get older revert back to some of the same sex behavior as they did when we were adolescents. I know I had a group of guys I had fun with, playing nekkid with, exploring one another's nude bodies, jacking-off, etc. And we did this almost everyday for a time. But think I tend to agree with Mani that it may be a nice fantasy but not necessarily translate to being such an appealing experience in real life.  Anyway. Maybe I think too much & Guess you have to keep exploring day by day experience by experience, be open minded, and see where things lead.     
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